> A grammar game! I know someone who would love this. But I shouldn't make fun, especially since I want to buy the book it's based upon. UPDATE: I bought the book. I loved it. Go get it now!
Ah, so much has changed in six years. I think I'm a different person, and I'm not just talking about the hair colour. :)
a
<thursday august 5, 2004 - 12:52 p.m>
ed: Comments are working now!
The other night I was on the receiving end of the ultimate question. My older daughter, the apple of my eye, asked me this question right before bed, after story time and before the final tuck-in and goodnight hugs and kisses. To me, her choice of timing was a clear indicator of exactly how important this matter was to her.
Her question was this: “Why don’t you play Monster with me anymore, mummy?”
What is “Monster?” Well, I’ll tell you, but our version of this game is probably the same as everyone else’s. From Amsterdam to Zimbabwe and every other place in between, parents can found chasing their children with outstretched arms while making scary noises. And that’s about all there is to it. I chase. She runs.
Her question took me by surprise. I told her: “I don’t always want to play monster when you do. Do YOU want to play it with me every minute of every day?” I wasn’t sure where I was going with this, but given that she spends a lot of time doing other things I was banking on a “No.” But her answer was swiftly and resoundingly affirmative. Apparently she does want me to chase her around the house while shrieking and howling at the top of my lungs. I wonder what the neighbors think.
But she’s right. I don’t play Monster very much anymore. And I know why.
When our children are infants we spend all waking hours trying to keep them entertained. We jingle bright Whoozits at them, shake rattles, and coo at them in sing songy voices. If we’re REALLY desperate we turn to things like purple dinosaurs and primary-coloured creatures with televisions embedded in their abdomens.
As our children grow older they don’t require as much direct supervision. (Please note that I wouldn’t leave my daughters alone while they played with their father’s toolbox.) As they learn to entertain themselves, parents naturally take advantage this newfound “free time.” At first, these episodes are short and infrequent. They translate into a few seconds to gulp down a cup of tea, brush our teeth, or read a page of a newspaper. (In our house, the Saturday paper provided food for thought way into the following week.)
As they get older it starts happening more often, and eventually our children stop needing us to keep them occupied.
I finally understand why mothers who bring their children to the park are more likely to be seen flipping the pages of a book than scaling the monkey bars or squeezing into the tire swing with their kids.
Most parents barely have time for themselves during the first years of a child’s life, so four or five years later we rush to catch up. We devour those books and suck back all the lattes we never had time to consume and enjoy… all this while junior is off playing in the sandbox. But we do this to maintain a healthy balance, otherwise we’d go crazy, right?
But there’s the key: balance. We do need time to ourselves, but our children need us too. According to the experts, playing with our children helps shape them into well-rounded individuals. While they explore the world around them they are learning all about it. And if we are at their side, playing at their level, it will help strengthen the bond between us. I would rather play catch NOW, than find myself sobbing into the shoulder of an $80/hr family therapist twenty years from now.
So I have promised myself that I will play Monster whenever it’s requested of me. I belong to my daughters as long as they need me, as long as it's not before I’ve had my morning cup o' tea. :)
a
<tuesday august 3, 2004 - 9:19 a.m>
An extended post is out of the question today. I am scrambling to catch up with my work.
For now, check out this photo. In case you're wondering, it was taken in the Miniature Village in Cullen Gardens. :)
Enlarged version is available 
